Q: I’m questioning my faith but am scared to discuss it with anyone. Would therapy be a good place to talk about it? – Sue from Provo
A: Questions of ones faith can be very complicated and confusing. In my opinion it would be helpful for you to discuss it with someone, and yes, a therapist would be a good option. One thing to keep in mind, look for a therapist who is unbiased in their approach. That way you can decide what you believe and don’t believe without their personal opinions being a part of it. Best wishes – Florie
Q: My boyfriend is really depressed. How do I get him to go to therapy? – Lisa from Midvale
A: I’m sorry to hear about your boyfriend’s depression. I understand it can be difficult for you and you may feel powerless to help. In my opinion, people won’t go to therapy until they are ready. And if they do go, they are resistant to change if they’re are not there willingly. My suggestion would be for you to enter into therapy yourself to understand how to navigate the relationship. Best wishes – Florie
Parenthood is difficult enough, in and of itself, let alone in this complicated world. We all worry about the effects today’s world will have on our children. Whether they be 5 or 25, what can we do to help them?
- Be a support. Whatever our kids are dealing with, we can continuously reinforce that we are there for them. Checking in regularly and offering what type of support we can will keep those channels open. Our hope is that they don’t feel alone in whatever issues they are dealing with.
- Lead by example. How are we surviving today’s world? Are we coping in healthy ways? If not, we may change some of our coping mechanisms in order to help ourselves and indirectly help our children. For example, a little less “screen time” and a little more spending time outside.
- Spend time together. Arrange and plan regular occasions to spend time with your children. Time can be spent face to face, with a group or family, or over FaceTime or Skype.
- Emphasis your faith in their abilities. Oftentimes we focus on our kid’s weaknesses vs. their strengths. By doing this we undermine their sense of self. By reinforcing our “you can do this” attitude, we have toward our children, we reinforce their confidence.
- Involve them in decision making and give them responsibilities. Sometimes it is hard for us, as parents, to give up control of family activities or decisions. By delegating we can lighten our load and strengthen our children’s confidence in themselves at the same time.
Bottom Line: Rather than being passive, take a pro-active approach to being involved in our children’s lives.
-Florie W. Jackson, Salt Lake Counseling Services